08 December 2006

Spam: The New Oracle.

So, I launched this site on Halloween and promptly got overwhelmed in the real world, which led me to a nice six week break from internet posting, a small nervous breakdown, and some interesting ideas for oracles — although not necessarily in that order.

I recently read a fun little book called The Book Of Ordinary Oracles by Lon Milo Duquette. It has several great ideas for new-fangled oracles (including using your television and remote control to answer all of your questions), but the main message is that you are the oracle — or rather, you are the channel for the oracular force you’ve contacted — so it doesn’t matter what method you use. You just have to ask the right question…and interpret the answer correctly.

I have found through experience that phrasing your question properly is the most effective way of receiving a good answer. I came into fortune-telling all dewy eyed and filled with wonder as a young teenager, and of course I burned with questions like “Does so-and-so like me?” Let me tell you, that is NOT a good question. First of all, it doesn’t settle anything or even answer anything. I’ve personally “liked” lots of people I never went out with, and I’m sure lots of people have “liked” me without me ever knowing it. Okay, maybe that’s just the arrogance I employ to get through day to day living, but still — bear with me here. I got lots of wildly inaccurate readings from all sort of different oracles during that time of my life, but when I met the I Ching, all of that changed.

The I Ching demanded different questions, as it gave entirely different sorts of answers. I learned to ask about cause and effect, or what direction energy was flowing. Questions requiring a strict yes or no were out — questions with a purpose were in. In fact, it was my experience with the I Ching that allowed me to loosen up and really start to read for other people (mainly tarot). Once I got past the question problem, I could start to really focus on interpreting what was there — not what I wanted to be there, but what was really there.

Anyway, this brings me to my new oracle. I recently experienced a deluge of spam on my main e-mail account — a triple fold increase in volume. It has let up somewhat, but the funny thing was this this spam-a-thon occurred right around the same time that I was mulling over an older post on Tim Boucher’s excellent journal about how the internet may be attempting to communicate with us.

Since synchronicity tends to be a hallmark of my path (that is, when startling coincidences show up, I know I’m on the right track), I thought — okay, if the internet is trying to communicate, is it an oracle? Could it be an oracle? Since most spam is concerned with our primal needs, it seems to me a perfect match for the sorts of everyday matters most people ask oracles about. Number one oracle concern: Love and or sex life. Well, look in your spam box, and you’re likely to be overwhelmed with offers for discount erectile dysfunction drugs, penis expansion programs, and Russian mail order brides. Number two would be money or work, and spam has that covered, too: Replica Rolexes to impress your clients, H000t stock tips, and offers for low interest mortgages. Then there are the spam mail that makes no sense at all, and those can be the most powerful oracle of all: Like classic bibliomancy or casting lots into the sand, you can simply open your spam mail box and scan the titles for your answer.

Like any oracle, the trick is to ask the right question — and interpret it correctly.

No comments: